Saturday, December 10, 2011

15 days


For the last couple days, my husband cannot seem to keep his oxygen levels up.  He is very weak and for the sake of keeping him comfortable, his best bet is to sleep as much as possible. 

While waking from a nap I said to him, "Merry Christmas, Baby."
"Do you think I will make it to Christmas?"  He asked.
"I don't know, Babe."  I replied.

Good thing his eyes were closed so he could not see my face, twisted in a grimace.  Trying to lighten the mood, I asked him if he has been a good boy this last year.  
He shook his head "no".
"Oh, yes you have!  Well, you have had a few moments here and there, but nothing to worry about."  I told him.

"So, what would you like for Christmas?"  I asked
"Gelato."  He replied.

Well, we do not live in Italy, but there is a little store near by that sells a good version of the yummy treat.  I asked him if he wanted the Vanilla Bean or the Dark Chocolate Fudge and he said he would like both. 

He then drifted off to sleep again and ten minutes later awoke long enough to ask if the Gelato was here yet.  Of course I hadn't left to get it yet, but told him it would be soon.  A bit later, he asked again.  Suddenly the need for me to get a hold of Gelato was quite intense.  I counted the moments that the children would be coming home from school so that I could run and get the ice-cream. 

Later, in the car, I headed for the store.  Our town looks so pretty this time of year.  The farm fields dusted with snow.  It was clear outside and just about at sunset.  In the distance I saw the prettiest moon.  So big and heavy on the horizon.  It was glowing in a white and blue tone.  It reminded me of all of the moon's my husband and I have gazed at.  It hits me that we do not have many more moons to share. 

How strange it feels to know that Christmas is only 15 days away and neither my husband or I know if his life will last that long. 
No matter where I go, it seems like he is in everything I see.

That night, he ate his Gelato and let the coolness sooth his throat.  We talked about the first time he had tried Gelato, on our honeymoon, and all the things we did together. 
It was a beautiful night.

2 comments:

  1. LIVING THE SAME THING WITH MY HUSBAND. MY HEART ACHES FOR YOU AND YOUR HUSBAND. I SEE HIM IN EVERYTHING & EVERY PLACE I GO. MY PRAYERS ARE WITH YOU. FOR MY HUSBAND & MYSELF THE SONG "ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS YOU" SAYS IT ALL. GOD BLESS YOU BOTH. (((((HUGS)))))

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  2. My heart goes out to all families who are going through losing a loved one or who has lost a loved one. I know I am not alone and my love and prayers are with each and everyone of you! xoxo

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