Tuesday, November 1, 2011

In a Safe Spot

My hubby's illness has caused him to lose much weight and therefore, he no longer wears his wedding ring.  Couples share many inside jokes and one of ours is when I ask him,
"Where's your wedding ring?"
He always replies, "In a safe spot." 

I really have no idea where that spot is, but I always know when I ask that question, he will respond in the same way. 
No matter how he feels or how deep asleep he is, if I pose the question to him he always says that his ring is in a safe spot. 

As his illness, Pulmonary Fibrosis, has progressed, it has become very obvious how serious a disease it is. 
In a few short weeks, he went from bathing himself, to unable to leave his bed. 
Being an annoying wife, I still ask him that question,
"Where is your wedding ring?"
 He still answers, 
"In a safe spot."

Although, me being me, I had to go one step further.
"Well, I hope there is a sweet love note with it.  You know how I love, love notes."
To that, no reply from him.

This month was my birthday and he commissioned our in-home care provider, McKenzie, a shopping list of presents that I told him were not necessary.  But he did it anyway. 
One thing I absolutely knew was on the list was a pair of slippers.

As romantic as my hubby is, he is also practical.  Every year on my birthday, I get pair of ballerina slippers to keep my feet warm through the winter.  Oh, and of course, a card.  My hubby picks out the most sentimental cards ever!  Guaranteed to make me cry. 

This year, as I reached into my gift bag, through the pastel-colored tissue my hands found the slippers. 
"Do you see the card?" He asked.

But, I didn't.  There was no card in the bag.
"Oh, no!  I had a card for you filled out and everything.  It was in a creamy-gray envelope.  Are you sure it is not there?"  He asked.
"I don't see it, Babe.  Don't worry it will most likely turn up"  I said.

I did not find the card and he seemed very worried about it, but maybe one day, I will find the card where I will find his wedding ring. 
In a safe place.


  1. We all need a 'safe place', and I too was recently diagnosed with IPF. It really puts life in perspective and every day I can I look and marvel at the blue sky along with the simple things in life that have suddenly become really important. When I was first diagnosed (September of this year) I went through that cycle of disbelief, fear, anger and finally acceptance. I found I was not alone and am dedicating my life to raising awareness of the rotten disease.

    There are many support groups online and more and more appearing around the country to offer support for patients and caregivers alike as well as new drugs and other solutions being tested to stop this killer in it's tracks. Stopping it has to start with awareness and you're doing your part.

    Thanks for your blog and tell your husband to breathe easy and well and that life does go on.

  2. My hubby cannot wear his wedding ring because of his work so he got a tattoo on his ring finger. He actually created the design and I got the same tattoo behind my ear. He said it was not dainty enough for my finger but in order for us to be connected I got it behind my left ear so as to symbolize a wedding ring. I hope we can cherish our rings as much as you both do yours. I hope you find your card.(Maria)

  3. I found his wedding ring in a box within his closet. I wear it below the ring he gave me when we wed. It is loose, but my ring on top of it holds it in place.